Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Thursday October 14
I think that it was interesting to do these readings and see how the idea of marriages and civil unions have evolved over a nearly twenty year span. Starting with Paula Ettelbrick's "Since When is Marrage a Path to Liberation?" which was written in 1989, I go the impression that she was strongly encouraging the concept of a Civil Union. Her main point against marriage for gays and lesbians was that it would "fource [their] assimilation into the mainstream" (306). And therefore would disregard the main ideals that the gay and lesbian community had been fighting for such as "the affirmation of fay identity and culture; and the validation of many forms of relationships" (306). She argues that the law does not provide any room for differences, and therefore gays and lesbians would have to conform to what a "typical" marriage function as, if they wanted to have the right to get married. Ettelbrick points out many reasons for why gays and lesbians should not be fighting for the right to marriage, but instead keep working to develop and enforce alternatives to marriage. I think that since gay marriage rights are such a mainstream issue, that it was shocking for me to read a piece that was so strongly opposed to marriage. I found it ironic, especially after reading "Gender and Society" by Nancy A. Naples and the Same Sex Marriage FAQs, that what it seemed like Ettelbrick was pushing for was a civil union. In the Same Sex Marriage FAQs we are again reminded of all of the rights that married couples are entitled to, such as hospital visistaion rights and social security benefits. Not to mention that marriage grants state and federal rights, whereas civil unions only grant couples state rights. As the facts stated "they are separate and unequal." Additionally, Naples points out that in certain states, same sex parents are able to adopt children but are not allowed to marry. And to go even a step further, at one point the article states that some parents are cautioned parents against applying for a civil union before the adoption process is completed because it could make the process more difficult or prohibit them from completing the adoption all together (682). However, we have to remember the risks that accompany parents who are not married that have children in the sense of the lack of legal rights that both parents have if they are not married. It was ironic for me to see how twenty years ago a civil union would be considered a large step in the positive direction, but today, a civil union is not enough.
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I found the article by Ettlebrick interesting as well. Emily makes a very good point. It was shocking for me as well, to see a Lesbian so opposed to same-sex marriage. I had never looked at it from that perspective. She thinks that by gay people getting married, they "would be forced to claim that they are just like heterosexual couples"—and vow to structure their lives similarly. She thinks that making legal marriage for lesbian and gay couples would do absolutely nothing to change the power imbalances between those who are married and those who are not. She has this notion that if gay men and women succumb to marriage then they will be assimilating themselves to mainstream heterosexual culture and thereby not continuing theGay and Lesbian movement in the positive direction. But this made me question, don't most gay couples strive to get married so they can achieve equality? Don't they want to lead lives where they can be open about their sexuality and join in marriage to someone they love? I think that Ettlebrick takes a very interesting approach to this issue and I thoroughly enjoyed seeing things from her persepective. Glancing at the same sex marriage faqs, I was astonished at the blatant rules segregated for straight couples and gay couples in regards to the benefits that they get. Gay couples aren't entitled to family leave to take care of their partners?Elderly gay couples don't have the right to spend their last days together in a nursing home? They can be denied the right to visit a sick or injured loved one in the hospital? All of these I had no idea were even facts and quite frankly, I am disgusted with them. I wish more people knew of the injustices that gay and lesbian people have to deal with on a daily basis.
ReplyDeleteI agree that seeing a lesbian be so against same-sex marriage was shocking for me as well. When we read articles about this issue, we always read about those who are pushing for this marriage to be legal. With marriage comes other rights like social security benefits. I always thought that all gays wanted to get married, so that they prove societies conception (that if gays get married they will raise their children to be gay) wrong and achieve equality with their heterosexual peers. It was interesting to see the other side of the argument since it is never expressed openly or in the media.
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